Calvaire (The Ordeal) 2004

Calvaire is a refreshing survival horror flick from the horror capital of the world, BELGIUM. OK, so maybe Belgium is a country better known for its beer. And maybe refreshing applies more aptly to the beer, but even with its obvious influences and odes, this movie takes a less traveled path.

Speaking of less traveled paths, that is where the protagonist’s van breaks down in the middle of the woods in rural Belgium. Marc is a solo singer/performer taking his show to various hot spots of entertainment around the country, starting with what looks to be a retirement home, where he is hit on by the nursing staff and the residents. He finishes the gig and gets on the road to make it to some Christmas Gala. Van breaks down and he finds some rustic inn nearby and is taken in by its kindly wizened proprietor, Bartel. Over dinner we learn that Bartel used to be a comedian and his wife (who left him) was a singer, like Marc. Well, after Marc spends the night after Bartel offers to fix the van, things start to get weird. Bartel decides that Marc is his wife that has returned to him, so he knocks him out with a car battery and puts him in a dress and, um “styles” his hair.

The local villagers are no better mentally, as they see Marc as Bartel’s returned wife as well. At least the leader of the villagers, played by Philipe Nahon (the disturbing lead in “I Stand Alone”) sees Marc as Bartel’s ex-wife, who he apparently had a thing for when she was around. So in addition to Bartel’s twisted captivity, the locals come after him as well, which leads to a lovely romp through the countryside.

Calvaire is a first effort from director Fabrice Du Weiz and he avoids a lot of the cliché horror movie fallbacks. There are no stab cues in the music, the ending is very non-standard, and although I am a fan of excess gore, I don’t think this would have benefited this movie. It would have hurt the impact of the creepy and disturbing parts (like the dancing scene at the local watering hole, or Marc’s visit to the ‘petting’ farm). The downside of avoiding horror clichés is the lack of nudity, although he does manage to shoehorn in a teeny bit via a stack of Polaroids from the nursing staff to Marc, as part of his “payment”. Definitely worth a watch.

3 Georges